Is He Masc or Just Has No Personality?

You matched on Grindr. He says he’s masc. You meet up. He’s wearing grey sweats, barely speaks, and orders plain chicken breast. Suddenly you’re wondering: is he “masc,” or does he just have the personality of unsalted oatmeal?

Let’s break it down.

💪 Masc 101: What Does It Actually Mean?

Short for “masculine,” masc is how some queer men describe their style, vibe, or identity — often signaling traditional traits like deep voices, muscles, sports, or emotional stoicism. It’s giving “straight-acting,” whether they admit it or not.

Think:

• Jacob Elordi in Saltburn, brooding in silence.
  

• Or a Calvin Klein ad where the abs speak louder than the model ever will.
  

• Or those TikToks of guys drinking black coffee shirtless, captioned “men don’t cry.”
  

But here’s the twist: sometimes masc isn’t presence — it’s just absence. Of emotion, creativity, self-awareness... and yeah, personality.

😶 When Masc = Minimal Effort

Not every masc-identifying guy is a snooze-fest, but let’s call out a trend:

• His hobbies? “Gym.”
  

• Favorite color? “Black.”
  

• Emotional range? Somewhere between dry toast and an Apple Notes app.
  

• Thinks Pedro Pascal is “too quirky.”
  

• Refuses to use ✨ emojis because they're “too much.”

Illustration by Kurt McRobert

It’s not giving alpha.
It’s giving... air fryer with no seasoning.

🧠 Masc Culture’s Personality Trap

In queer spaces, masc gets worshipped — it’s the golden boy of dating apps, hookup culture, and even brand campaigns. (Hi, Tom of Finland fantasies.) But the danger? Masc becomes a shortcut to desirability. A badge. A mask.

1. Softness gets suppressed to “fit the part.”
   

2. Queerness gets dulled to appeal to the algorithm.
   

3. Personality? Left out of the gym bag.
   

Masc should never mean emotionally unavailable. And yet... here we are.

🔥 Who Does It Right?

Let’s celebrate the men who serve masc and soul:

• Lil Nas X: Booty out, bars tight, and still vulnerable AF in interviews.
  

• Bad Bunny: Masc energy in a skirt and acrylic nails — and somehow still your straight friends’ man crush.
  

• Jonathan Bailey (Bridgerton) serving smoldering stares and Shakespeare-level depth.
  

Masc isn’t the problem. Bland is.

🌈 Personality Is the New Masc

So what counts as personality?

• A niche obsession with frogs.
  

• Oversharing childhood trauma, but in a sexy way.
  

• Quoting Mean Girls one second, discussing attachment styles the next.
  

• Wearing mesh, lip gloss, and reading Bell Hooks on a rooftop.
  
  

We want masc. We want femme. We want weird, wild, witty, and emotionally literate. We want someone who can deadlift 250 pounds and say “I’m proud of you” without flinching.

💬 Final Thought

Next time someone says “I’m masc,” ask them:

“Cool, but do you believe in aliens? What’s your go-to karaoke song? Have you ever cried to Blonde?”

If he can't answer at least one?
Maybe he's not masc.
Maybe he’s just... a walking gym membership with WiFi.